Phyllis Diller

Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home.

Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.

Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.

My mother-in-law had a pain beneath her left breast. Turned out to be a trick knee.

Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home.

Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age. As your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.

A smile is a curve that sets everything straight.

- Phyllis Diller